AJ opened up the show, calling out CM Punk and drooling over him for an awkwardly long period of time before… proposing to him. Wow. Daniel Bryan finally intervened and eventually proposed to AJ! Before any questions could be answered, the Anonymous Raw GM returned and set up a match featuring Punk & AJ vs. Bryan & Eve. This was a crazy (in a good way) opening segment, but it went on way too long.
Sheamus then beat Jack Swagger in about a minute. Alberto Del Rio egged him on via the Titantron, angering Sheamus so much that he gave Swagger another Brogue Kick. Backstage, Santino Marella pledged to find out the identity of the Anonymous GM. Hey, someone needs to. In another oddly quick match, Tensai and Dolph Ziggler beat Christian and Tyson Kidd. Tensai made a point of beating down Kidd afterward. Odd booking here, but it gave Tensai some serious steam.
The Anonymous Raw GM gave everyone the ability to vote on whether or not they wanted to see Jerry Lawler fight Michael Cole. Go figure. Next up, Brodus Clay took longer to get to the ring than he did to beat Drew McIntyre. Poor guy. He should be doing more than jobbing. But the show finally moved to a real match with John Cena & Kane vs. Big Show & Chris Jericho, though not before Cena promised he would win on Sunday. Unfortunately, this means that he probably will.
The tag match got some decent time until it ended in a DQ for no real reason. Big Show pulled out a pair of ladders and went to town on Kane & Jericho, but Cena stopped him and knocked him out of the ring. The only thing wrong with this segment was that made Jericho look very weak and Kane look a little irrelevant. Backstage, Eve provoked Punk in a pretty interesting segment.
There was at least one more surprise in store, as the other ladder match was about to have one more person added to the mix. Sin Cara faced Heath Slater in a qualifying match. Ugh. Guess who won. But this segment was not without some value, as an old-but-cut Bob Backlund came to the ring to answer Slater’s challenge. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that a Cross-faced Chicken Wing ensued.
As fate would have it, 75% voted for the Cole vs. Lawler match to take place. It consisted of an Airplane Spin and a pinfall, but the Anonymous GM reversed the decision. Enter Detective Santino. He looked under the ring to discover that, all this time, the Anonymous GM was… Hornswoggle. That was the best they could come up with. Hornswoggle. It was up to the main event to save this show.
Bryan refused a tag from Eve, allowing for AJ to roll her up for the victory. After the match, Punk refused AJ’s proposal, prompting a slap – a slap to Punk, and a slap to Bryan. AJ skipped off while chanting, “Yes,” as in: Was this a lousy episode of ‘Raw’? Yes! Yes! Yes!
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